Is your time to free minds or for falling apart?

It’s my last chance for romance …… TONIIIIIIIIIGHT!

Band went rather spectacularly today. Yay. We only played acoustic but we got 2 songs down so that was quite grand/productive.

So I did end up talking to soph and she at least is cleared up on how I feel and such. She really didn’t say much other than agreeing that she didn’t really know since we have been dancing around it. Damn I love Indian food though.

 It’s really funny how I can be closer again with someone when they move all the way across the country. Ashley helped me decide what to where via pix messages … we’re not lame.

So Robbie/Hot RockHis Boy actually came to class today … quite exciting. However there are only 2 classes left and I am starting to be all pathetic about how it is doubtful anything shall occur. He still in fact looked today though. Plus! I totally have soph fooled into thinking I am just merely curious about his lookings. So she has agreed to accompany me sitting on the other side around his area. hehe I am so lame … yeah what else is knew right?

But I am really feeling better today about my whole “life situation” … oh fucking well if most are phony-fake-ass-bitches! The few “real” friends I have are THE definitive best ever … I love them …. they matter to me, and I at least think I matter to them  and (about to get real corny) that is much more important to me than appearing to have a lot of friends of lesser quality

and oh shit! I have like 2 days to do this damn research paper

I typed more than showed up!? 

well anyways the gist of it was ” I propose we be lonely together far more often”

Leah!

bleh

I’m tired

why does dying always have to seem so easy?

I am the scum of the earth. I need to get over myself and stop being such an asshole. That. Or just get really comfortable with being alone.

is coming tomorrow!

I figured out what classes I shall take next semester … hopefully

ahh legs too tired can’t go on …

okay so james is quitting afterall

jebus christo man

ugh I am sick still……grrr I guess I am getting better though

well I took far too long of a time to get back on here and divulge every subtlety of my cal poly/slo visit … but the 2 basic things I learned :

1. Dang I should have went away to college somewhere! The experience of going away from everything you’re familiar with, living with other people you don’t know, being independent … it’s really something we all need to try.

2. It kinda sucks sometimes how straightedge I am. I mean it is pretty lame to be peer pressured into drinking or doing any sort of drug … but damn the pull is quite strong …much stronger than I had ever previously anticipated. When going to parties, it seems that if you aren’t inebriated you don’t get to participate in the fun/social part. eh….. whatever people watching is cool

So I guess James isn’t quitting the band afterall? I dunno, he is so wishy-washy! Eitherway, practice was good yesterday … I didn’t do all that much on account of my sickness … but we have 2 new song ideas so I need to work on spittin’ out them lyrics …aha ….and we also worked on that song that still has no name ( names should be easier than writing the actual song shouldn’t it?) and make my day. So it was cool beans…… hopefully gigging soon and doing the battle of the bands …

I swear I am so getting a godforsaken B in my psych class, I can’t seem to get anything but Bs on the tests …….hum

This coming week shall be one of many an interesting time I predict ….. Smith gets here on Saturday ….. then thanksgiving …. and Sarah’s wedding

Let the good times roll

okay dude some of that stuff didn’t appear to clarify……… i am no longer crushing on collin… he isn’t my “crush” … there are no feelings

dang I really have not been on here in awhile i suppose I guess I get busy with a lot of petty shit 

anywho my first post on this was about how I was pretty darn sure that my friendhsip with my like omg!bestfriend had ended ….. but it didn’t I guess

 Yesterday … well Halloween I think we officially recconected or i dunno what the word for it would be … I am not entirely thinking all that well right now I am sure

I need to quit being all dairy fiendish

I am worried about James … but I really don’t know what i can do to help him?

so yeah I guess back again to the soph thing

or not I don’t really feel like going into it right now but we are cool again ….for now

Damn what a weird sucky week it has been …… dude damn….dude I have went to only 1 class this week……….that is so fucked

goddamn I am such a terrible student …..like terrible terrible

 so much for a fucking 4.0 haha

I haven’t eaten anything all day … well I haven’t been concious the whole day

well I had some chocolate

i haven’t had a meal

I am going to eat

even though I should be sleeping so maybe I can actually wake up tomorrow

on time

why the hell is that brian-news-guy hosting SNL? they are getting damn random with their hosts

thank goodness for andy samberg

at some point I am really going to set aside time to officially and honestly spill my guts here but i don’t have the attention span for it now

until next time …